Deep Breathing
One coping skill you can use is called deep breathing. It is pretty common for people to suggest that someone take a deep breath when they are feeling anxious. But many people say that taking deep breaths does not work for them. It may even be frustrating or annoying if you are told to take a deep breath when you are feeling extremely anxious. And this makes a lot of sense! Taking one deep breath does not usually change a whole lot and being told to “just breathe” can be one of the last things you want to hear when you are feeling really overwhelmed.
But if you are willing to try it, deep breathing can be one of the most powerful tools we have to help us manage anxiety – but there is a bit more to it than just taking one deep breath. To practice deep breathing, you need to try focusing only on your breath. Closing your eyes may help you focus as you slow down your breathing, take a long and deep inhale, and then push the air out of your lungs as you take a long exhale. Deep breathing activates the parasympathetic nervous system, which is the part of our brain and body that helps us feel relaxed.
There are a few different ways to practice deep breathing, but we will give you one example for you to try out: (View as PDF)
- Sit upright in a chair with your feet on the floor or lie down on the ground
- Close your eyes or try focusing on a single spot on the floor or wall
- Place your hands or a pillow on your stomach so you can feel and see how your stomach goes up and down as you breathe
- Breath in and try to fill up your stomach with air. Count to 7 as you breathe in, or keep breathing in until your stomach is completely filled with air
- As you breathe out, try to squeeze all the air out of your stomach. Count to 7 as you breathe out, or keep breathing out until your stomach is empty.
- Keep breathing in and out like this for 2 minutes, or until you feel more relaxed. You can also set a timer.
Take a few minutes to practice this deep breathing strategy. Then, think about how you felt after doing deep breathing. Did your body feel more relaxed (for example, did your heart rate slow down or did you feel less shaky or fidgety)? How are your thoughts and emotions different after completing this exercise?
Mindfulness
Another coping skill we will introduce you to is called mindfulness, which is all about focusing on the present moment. When we feel anxious, we are usually worrying about the future. For example, we could be thinking about possible worst-case scenarios and outcomes, or we may be thinking of future events we are nervous about. Practicing mindfulness can help with worries about the future by bringing our thoughts and feelings back to the here and now.
One way to practice mindfulness is with a grounding exercise that we call “Grounding 5-4-3-2-1”. This exercise is about noticing your environment with all five of your senses (seeing, touching, hearing, smelling, and tasting). While practicing grounding exercises, remember to focus on the present moment without any judgments.
Here's a worksheet for you to use when practicing this skill: Grounding 5-4-3-2-1